One of the greatest dangers in life is hopelessness. When we are at the end of our rope, when we can’t see the way out, when we are overwhelmed and underdone, when we cannot see the path in front of us, we freeze. And in that fight or flight freeze, we can slip into despair, depression, panic, or chronic anxiety. We can feel lost. We can feel alone. We can feel weighed down so heavy with the darkness in front we cannot see the light right in front of our face. That is when The Power of Possibility can pull us from the darkest depths into a light we may have never known existed.
This challenge can also face our children. Kids deal with so much stress today. Fear is fed to them at every chance. They are searching for answers as they grow and discover who they are in this world. It’s enough to bring anyone down at different times of our lives. By finding possibility we not only help ourselves, but we can use these tools to help our kids find the answers to their issues as well.
There are many ways to use this power, but today we will focus on a few:
1. Opposite Day
Imagine you are in despair. You have had a great loss, a job, a parent, a friend, a move, a big change has occurred. You are looking at the void, trapped, caught in the vortex of “What now?” But what you have done in the past has not worked. You have tried so many ways. Doing what you have always done has not worked.
What to do? Make two columns on a piece of paper. Write down what you have done in the past. Write down the thoughts you have had, the ideas that didn’t work out, and then? Write down the opposite on the other side of the paper.
And then choose an opposite action to do, and do it! For one day, do the opposite! And if it works, do it again.
When we are in the throws of negative thinking the things we think can drive us deeper into the hole. Our instincts are to throw that pity party and feed that negative side. Have an Opposite Day.
When the thoughts come: “This will not work out. I can’t do this!” change it to “This can work out, and I can make it work out.” And then do it. See what happens! (It is amazing what does.)
* Coach your kids! Share with them the idea of Opposite Day before the mood hits. Then when they are facing a challenge and giving you a million reasons why something won’t work, ask it the opposite was true.
2. Theory of Wonder
If opposite is not your thing, or you aren’t ready to do the opposite, then maybe it’s time to start day dreaming. Day dreaming is a way to pull us out of the reality we are in and create the reality we wish we were living. We can live whatever life we want to live when we day dream. We can be whoever we wish to be. The fun is? Our bodies do not know the difference. Our bodies inside act as though the day dream is real, so it reacts positively and gives us positive feelings.
Just imagine if whatever you were facing worked out so well you could not even imagine it and then, imagine it! Use your power of imagination to bring to life that which you wish could be true, to give you the focus to make it true.
When you imagine, pay attention to what ideas and feelings come up.
Where do you go when you day dream? Who do you become? When we are given free reign to day dream into infinite possibility, it can give us clues as to what is missing in our lives. Are you relaxing on a beach? Maybe you need to spend some time at the park in nature by water. Are you doing a hobby you love as a job? Then perhaps it’s time to see how that hobby can be an actual lifestyle reality for you as a career. Do you spend time with friends or family, or in community, in your day dreams? Then it’s time to call a friend.
Take clues from your day dreams helps you learn to understand who you are and what you are missing and wish you could have now in life.
*Coach Your Kids! - Ask them to use their imagination to find a solution or a place to escape to when they are stressed. If you are able to ask and have a conversation about what they imagine and where they go, you can learn a lot about your child, who they are, and what they really need in life.
Possibilities are endless in life. Life throws us limitations and challenges our way. When we get caught in that space of “I don’t know.” having a few tools under our belt to get us un-stuck and moving into the groove again can be life saving.
What possibilities are you opening up to today?
(aka JP Starre)
Find out more about how to find your possibilities at:
Mindful Musings Blog
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